Eating cookies in the shower is worth defending!

With an HK-91, no less. 7.62×51mm NATO rifle cartridge sends 150 grain bullet out of the muzzle at ~2800fps (feet per second). That’s ~2.58 times the speed of sound.

At least he shows proper trigger finger discipline!

Defending his muffins of course. the shower is your best fort.

if i had a gun like that and a really good muffin, i would would do the same thing

“My cookie. You can’t have it. Go away.”

Zombies attacked during a healthy, nutritional breakfast shower, which Dave does every week. obviously.

“Bitch took ma MILK!”

During a siege, everybody has to shower and everybody has to eat.

My guess: He was late for work so grabbed a muffin and then went to start the shower water when suddenly…..
GIANT AMPHIBIOUS OCTOPUSS ATTACK!

He quickly reacts by grabbing the gun he keeps next to the toilet (because he never wants to be caught with his pants down, so to speak) and gets ready to defend himself. Unfortunetly the octopus is really slow so he gets bored and takes a bite of his muffin but tries to stay alert and not let his guard down.
but that’s just a guess, it could have been a squid I supposed.

I got it. Meth.

I’m half tempted to call this a win…. or failtacular, a fail so epic it’s almost a win.

cops are knocking at the door. he’s enjoying the last special brownie, the last “safe” shower, and the gun just makes him feel better since he’s goin to a mexican prison.